Don't Make Me

Don't make me

Even if i keep all these words at bay,
The secret must also be mine to keep.
If I keep all my ghosts for myself then
I can look you in the eyes and so smile.
What you've given to me is worthy of
The millions of weary tears just as it is.
Don't make me say it, oh please, love
As some wrongs can never be cleared.

Don't make me speak out loud now,
Because I know of the transparency.
Don't make it flesh and blood, I beg!
I need your light in spite of everything.
Don't pierce this membrane artifact,
This dam is thin, and my form thinner.
Don't make me admit my path is clear
Because I cannot gamble, cannot win.

If it suits you to ignore my face, then do.
If you must witness my setting sun, say.
Don't make it all or nothing, I have none.
There is nothing of me for you, but you.
Don't make me tell you what is so darkly
Held by my fragility, I've lost all ground.
Don't make me fracture my own lunacy
I know value's price, and to cost me you.

Don't make me tell you what you can't.
It lacks the civility that you would seek.
I have spoken all the truths of you I may.
I can only dance on edges, hum the tune.
I cannot bury another body into my self,
I cannot grieve another flame into eternity.
I know you see this, know you hear it and
Know you'll not share it; know all I need.

Don't, don't, please love, don't ask me,
I've fallen a hundred times all on my own.
If you would keep me then love a silence.
If you need this, then accept it as it is now.
I can suffer in my gratitude, and obscurity.
I can be all that I am now inside tranquility.
Please don't make known my heavy heart
That even now would cower in fear of me.

I would choose to take my leave if asked,
Would let the void fill in the space between,
If you desire, you can beg of my everything!
If you could settle, then settle my subtlety.
Don't make me tell you how I've died again
Because for you, I saw it, chose not blindly.
Without you, mind's voice would be muted.
Don't take these lovely treasures; take me.

-phoenix
9.29.2014