31 May, 2008

Mine Only Face

Mine Only Face

Darwin would have said I was the strong one.
Even those of relative intelligence can be fools.
I still hear you in the darkness, as you whisper;
asking me how I could have left you in that pit.
I feel as though the system failed you; oh my
beautiful missing tether; rest of my tired soul.

Never could I walk this path of your hero foot.
You were the strength I would long for, for all
my withered days as I’ve forged on in lowliness.
You still haunt me though, standing just beyond
glass where I may not reach, nor touch, nor hear
unless my sense is dampened in the day of night.

How could it be? We two are separate; dividing
ropes of time and space; I know I’ll not survive it.
How could I be the strong one, yet I may see only
your face in the looking glass? You’ve carried this
torch…it was your strength; stolen, sapped away
when you could barely feel me next to you at all.

Yes…I am the passenger of your body…invader of
the flesh that once was yours to share, division of
our person was to be a blessing, yet is the curse of
my solitary existence, punishment for my desire.
I have always longed for those conversations in
the dark, reminders of what was only momentary.

I have unwittingly sent you beyond the realms of
this plastic bubble, where I may never retrieve the
saviour of my soul. Each night you have wandered
along side me and each morning comes your next
untimely death and mine new sorrowful awakening.
And Darwin would have said I was the strong one…

---phoenix
5/31/2008

[This is the saddest and possibly most painful thing I’ve ever attempted to write…and I hope you can hear me sobbing as I do…I’ll always love you and I never even got to say hello or know your name…to the first one I loved.]

any copying/reproduction/distribution of this writing, in whole or in part, without express permission from the author is strictly prohibited. ©SaerenPhoenix 2008

(Please contact the author with questions.)

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